Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Living in The Age of Insult

Today, we are living in the age of insult. Anyone can freely and openly insult one another, mostly in the name of telling the truth. The truth is, our population currently evolves to adapt this habit of insult as another nature of life. Although this habit is growing rapidly on today’s web, it had been scavenging the lands for as long as we can remember; and thus it also had evolved into a more carnivorous type.

During this age, when anyone insults you, you are considered weak if you didn’t fight back. You have to argue them and defend yourself from all the negative things they said, and if you could do so until all of them shut their mouth, you are a great man. According to the professionals of this age, it is okay to insult those who had insulted us in means of proving they had done bigger mistake than us and we had done nothing wrong - or only a small, tiny mistake compared to them.

Some would even suggest developing a counter-insult weapon, which consist mainly of the possible insulter’s personal secrets and dark history that would bring shame if known to public. A deadly weapon indeed, but the deadliest of all is none other than The Backstabber itself. The best way to bring down the enemy is by being by their side most of the time and ready to strike, anytime.

Let us be clear of one thing, insulting is not criticizing. They are not even close. Insulting is actions to ruin someone’s reputation upon a group and criticizing are a mean of advice that is direct; as some prefer the term harsh advice. Insults usually come into contact with other people first before it came to the insulted. There are reported cases of open face-to-face insult, and so it is practiced in many organizations. As for critics, the two sides would confront one another and have the will for a better future from the start of their meeting.

Insult is a very good anger-starter. Most of the time, it ended up in a fight either verbally or physically. When our pride is at stake and our great efforts are dummied, it’s not a surprise if any of us suddenly vent out a heavy punch or two, they deserve it.

In these situations, we are greatly urged to take defensive measures. However, answering back is only satisfying for a temporary period, and it actually allows the opponent to win. It is pointless to make anyone who dislikes you to understand. They will give just enough rope to save yourself, but in the end they'll hang you with that same rope.

It is important to remain patient and if you need to talk, talk calmly. Being patience shows strength of character and signals to them you are not that timid. Patience is not losing the ability to be angry; patience is to control your anger instead of it controlling you.

He who angers you controls you. Thus, don’t make your anger cheap. Keep silent. Hold that tongue. And that hand. Negative behavior meets negative behavior won’t produce a positive atmosphere. Just bear in mind, in reality, there are some people that would insult others to make themselves look good and feel good. But if you have to insult others to be happy, there is definitely something wrong with your life.

As insult requires high patience and perseverance, handling critics is another thing. Most people can’t accept raw-critics. Thus, just like raw milk, it had to be processed in order to be taken in easily and confidently. A vital order on critics processing is separation.  Separate the critics word by word from the way you hear it and you’ll eventually get their point. Then, after it finishes processing, it’s up to you to eat up the critics or just put them on the table, keep it in view.

In the end, when your colleagues suddenly throw you strings of nasty words and you are still thinking of ‘defending’ yourself, imagine them with two horns on their heads and a tail in their back. Now, you wouldn’t waste your time arguing with that, would you?  XD

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